Sunday, November 2, 2008

Sundial

At fifteen
tragic circumstances unleashed
an unconscious monstrosity
on the world of men.
Intent on forgetting
That One Raw Night
Horas non numero nisi serenas
Even in the absence of light.

She changed then
became perhaps
what he had intended.
Dependably erratic in her escapades.
Finding human erasers
to erase what she couldn't face.

High school boys first.
Innocent badasses,
smoking in the fish market parking
lot, while she developed new charms
and then moved on.

Then sweet, nice virgins/potential priests
drug dealing lunatics
a skateboarder
some geeks
ones that made Promises
she couldn’t possibly let them keep.
They tore their own hearts up
confetti on New Year’s eve.
Each had a month or so before
her inevitable retreat.

Eventually she forgave
but the cycle was set.
Guys in bands
college physics TA’s
tattooed philosophers
and men who were never without
their cigarettes.

A dozen more
one for each season
of each descending year.
They meant nothing.

Still, she was looking for something.
Still forgetting that nothing.

Then - he is
Poetically Perfect
except
she is imPerfect.
And this time she is the nothing
for the first time since that night.

And she can’t forget
without Forgetting
that hope burned into flesh:
Horas non numero nisi serenas
Moments calculated in shadow.
Light in the absence of light.

1 comment:

Max said...

you stubborn fucking girl, if you'd have let us take care of it for you things could have been different. We love you anyway J-baby even if you are a horrible man eater.