Sunday, September 14, 2008

Excerpt

What makes today a bad day? Is it that I stayed in bed till noon, didn’t shower or take my pills, wasted the afternoon on young adult fiction and underfunded movies? Is this lethargy a direct result of the absence of nicotine in my polluted blood stream? One too many drinks at my sisters housewarming? And had I woken up at 6:15, showered, took my pills with my morning coffee, did some work before the movie, rationed out my cigarettes instead of going cold turkey, would this then have been a good day? Could the difference between these outlooks be a simple matter of routine?

I practiced breathing in the morning. 5 minutes lying on my back with the ceiling spinning over head. In and out and the steady rain beating down and the light slivers cutting through the shades. There are things I should be doing. Studying, cleaning, productivity. But really, what is more important than breathing? I imagine as I exhale I am ridding my body of all the toxins I have deposited there for safe keeping. An interesting theory.